5230 Peppermint Ave.
North Pole
December 14, 2011

Dear Sophie,

    My name is Lewis, and I’m the official watch guard of the North Pole. I keep naughty children from coming to take it over and get their presents early. We didn’t always need a watch guard at the North Pole. The first time naughty children came, we were completely unprepared. But with my brother Simon, we managed to save the North Pole from invading naughty children, or “Naughties” as we called them. I didn’t like it when they came, because we never did anything wrong to deserve it, and neither did the children whose presents the Naughties would have stolen.

But there will be plenty of time to tell you about that later. Right now, I have something important to say: If you want your doggie treats for Christmas, you’ll want to start being nicer to the other dogs. Don’t think we don’t know about that, because Bob and Joy are watching. You also might be curious of what life is like at the North Pole. What’s that? You’re not? Well, I’ll tell you anyway: It is really amazing here! The houses are made of candy and gingerbread, and sometimes magic! All the elves are always singing as they make toys and them! Reindeer look beautiful as they fly over us for test flights, and the air is filled with the wonderful scent of Mrs. Claus’s cooking.

But now, here’s the story of how I got my job as the official watch guard of the North Pole (this is really awesome so pay attention):

When I woke up that morning everything was cheery. The fellow elves were singing as they made toys for the big day, the reindeer were having a test flight in the air, and Mrs. Claus had just made a fresh batch of cookies. The day was looking up until I saw Santa with a ghastly look in his eyes.

    “Is something wrong, Mr. Claus?” I asked with concern.
    “Oh, hello Lewis. I just noticed a great amount of children haven’t been very nice this year, and instead of trying to be nicer, they seem to be getting naughtier,” said Santa.
    “What a shame. Looks like some certain kids aren’t getting what they want this year,” I said.
    “There aren’t too many children on the naughty list, but the ones who are haven’t stopped being naughty, especially this one boy named Amadeus,” said Santa.
    “Oh, well. They’ll probably make wiser choices next year,” I said, shrugging.
    Later that day, I was flying around on Comet high over the Elf Village. I liked Comet. He and I have always respected each other, mostly because I’m the ones who feeds him. The Village was beautiful from the sky. It looked like a field of candy. It was breathtaking, until I saw something on the horizon.
    It looked like an army of children. I flew back down to the Elf Village to warn everyone that there were children here, possibly to see their presents early. But when I made it down to the ground, I was too late, the children were in the Elf Village. They were everywhere. They were in all our candy-built houses, they were on the snowy streets, and in the eight reindeer stables. They were all searching for something. They were probably searching for their presents.
    The other elves were in hiding, hoping the children would leave without discovering them. Since I had just come from the air, I was easy to spot. It was hard to hide Comet with me. I tried to sneak him into my house, but there were two children in there, messing up my home. you could hear them talking through the window;
    “Do you think they’re all hiding?” asked the first one.
    “No, I think this whole place was made for decoration. Yes, they’re all hiding,” said the other one.
    “We better find them soon, or I’m going home,” said the first one.
    “Don’t go home, man. Amadeus promised that if we helped him take over the North Pole, we’ll get what presents we wanted, naughty or nice,” said the second one.
    “And we’ve been pretty naughty,” said the first one.
    “Amadeus! That’s one of the naughty children Santa mentioned,” I thought. “He wants to take over the North Pole? I knew Santa was disappointed, but this is really bad!”
    The next thing I knew, I was grabbed from behind. In a moment of madness, I thought it was the Amadeus boy, but it was only my brother Simon. He took me around back my house and we hid there.
    “Simon, thank goodness it’s you!” I exclaimed.
    “Quiet, or they’ll hear you, Lewis,” whispered Simon.
    “Okay. Listen, these kids aren’t just some average naughty kids who want their presents early, they actually want to take over the North Pole so they can get all the presents they want. Those kids in my house were talking about it,” I said.
    “What do we do?” asked Simon.
    “Remember the gas-guns and masks I built to stop the reindeer when they went out of control?” I asked.
    I could tell Simon figured out my plan from there. I went on anyway because it was a really good plan.
    “We can knock them out with them. While they’re asleep, Santa can take them home while he’s delivering presents tonight,” I said. “The hard part will be getting in without letting those kids know we’re in the house.”
    Simon pointed to the window on the second floor of my house.
    “We can climb in through there,” said Simon.
    “How do we get up there?” I asked.
    “Go get Comet from out front, we can fly him up there,” said Simon.
    “Oh, no! I left Comet out front where the Naughties can see him!” I said.
    “Naughties?”
    “I thought it would be a cool nickname for them.”
    “Whatever, just go get Comet!”
    I dashed around front to get Comet, but the two kids who were in my house got to him first. They tried to ride him around while he tried to kick them off of him.
    “Okay, bad news, they got Comet. Good news, I think the house is clear. The kids who were in my house are trying to ride him,” I told Simon.
    “So we can just go through the back without them knowing we’re here?” asked Simon as he opened the back door and walked in.
    I followed him in. We found the gas-guns with gas masks under my bed, untouched.
    “This should make things easier for us,” said Simon.
    After we got the gas masks and gas-guns, we went outside to see the kids actually flying Comet. When they saw us, they exclaimed “Elves!” as loud as they could.
    We gassed them immediately, and they fell asleep. Comet fell asleep too, but not before he could descend.
    Unfortunately, the two kids were not unheard. There were other children nearby who heard that child’s call. Soon, Naughties had arrived in boatloads. They didn’t seem like a very organized force, more of an angry and confused group of misled children. But they did know one thing: we work for Santa. When they saw us, they all tackled Simon and I. There was a constant chatter of “We want presents!”,  “Give us our presents!”, and ”Take us to Santa!” We were held down, with no way out. Before I could pull the trigger on my gas-gun, I heard one voice of a single child say “That’s enough.” and all the chatter stopped. All the children got off of us, and Simon and I were in the choke hold of a another naughty child who had not ambushed Simon and I.
    “My name is Amadeus, if you were wondering, but I know enough about your kind. Do not bore me with your names,” said the boy, commandingly. “You will take us to the one known as Santa Claus and his workshop. Comply immediately.”
    “Over my last candy cane, naughty boy,” I said as I aimed the gas-gun at his face.
    At lightning quick speed, he removed the gas mask from my face and put it on his. It was rather small on him, but he was able to protect himself from the fumes while I passed out from my own weapon.
    When I woke up, I was being held prisoner in my own house. I was tied to a chair in Christmas lights. when I looked in front of me, I saw Amadeus behind my kitchen table, sipping MY hot chocolate. Behind him stood his army of Naughties, hungry for undeserved presents.
    “Ah, you are awake. Now, tell where the fat man is, you worthless imp,” said Amadeus.
    “There’s a word for people like you, Amadeus,” I said.
    “Evil?”
    “Naughty. Where’s Simon?” I asked.
    “Oh, I believe evil is the right word,” said Amadeus as he turned my chair around to see Simon was hanging from a rope of tinsel above a cauldron of boiling caramel.
    “Why is he above caramel? That’s not so scary,” I said.
    “We didn’t have lava. But while caramel tastes good in candies, do you know how thick it can be to swim in? Too thick for one as stout as an elf to get out, that is for sure!” said Amadeus, sinisterly. “Now, tell me where Santa Claus is!”
    “Never! How about a deal? I’ll put a good word in for you if you let both of us go and leave this place,” I plead.
    “I highly doubt that after all this,” said Amadeus.
    I noticed he was becoming restless.
    “This is your last warning, you know I will drop him in. Now will you tell me or not?” questioned Amadeus.
    I got an idea when Amadeus said that. I squirmed my hand to my pocket, to see if I could find what I was looking for, and surely it was there.
    Amadeus interpreted my brief silence as I searched my pocket as a no.
    “You leave me no choice. Raise his friend and drop him in the cauldron!” commanded Amadeus.
    “Don’t drop Simon in that caramel, I’ll take his place,” I said.
    Amadeus was shocked, as he and the Naughties went into silence.
    “You mean that, runt?” asked Amadeus.
    I nodded my head, doing my best to look devastated. “Just don’t let Simon drown in that caramel.
    “Lewis?” asked Simon, confused.
    As Simon was carefully untied, I whispered “I’ve got a plan. Keep Amadeus busy.”
    After I was tied in the tinsel and held over the caramel by another naughty child, I carefully removed a candy cane from my pocket.
    Amadeus was distracted by Simon. He was now questioning Simon where Santa was, which gave me the perfect opportunity to get it out without him seeing it.
    “We are ready to drop the elf with your permission, sir,” said the Naughty holding me.
    “Do it,” said Amadeus, not looking away from Simon.
    I was dropped in the caramel, it really burned, but I could take it. Before I fell completely in, I was able to latch the candy cane on the edge of the cauldron, which I used to climb out of the thick caramel.
    All the Naughties were paying close attention to Simon, as he began to give Santa Claus’s false location. When I came out, I looked like a light brown monster, since I was covered in caramel. After I shook the caramel off, I was able to sneak around to find the gas-guns and masks. I found them on top of a shelf high up in my room. I couldn’t reach it, and I couldn’t climb since I was tied up in tinsel. So my only option was to knock it over.
    After the massive shelf had fallen, I was able to grab the gas-guns, and put the gas mask on. Sure enough, the Naughties heard it and a few of them came upstairs. I was able to gas them before they could even react, and ran downstairs before more came. They were all still down there, listening to Simon’s interrogation. I used the gas-gun as fast as I could, and soon the whole room was covered in a green fog. After I found Simon in the clouds of gas, I gave him a gas mask and we ran out the front door.
    “Nice work, Lewis,” said Simon as he began to untie me from the tinsel rope.
    “No one messes with Santa Claus,” I said.
    “You’ve got that right,” said Simon as he finally got the tinsel off.
    But before we could congratulate ourselves further, a raging Amadeus came out from the front door, with his patience at an end.
    “Alright, freaks, it’s personal now,” said Amadeus.
    “How come you didn’t pass out?” asked Simon.
    “I used my shirt as an air filter,” said Amadeus. “Now tell me where he is, or I’ll throw you in the ice water!”
    I tried to fire the gas-gun, but it seemed to have ran out of gas.
    “Even if we can’t stop you, do you think we’ll just let you go after you’ve taken all the presents? Santa can just go to your house and bring them all back!” I pointed out.
    Amadeus laughed. “Do you think I’m going home? I’m not going home after I’m done here! I’m going to stay forever, you will all make me presents, and I will have all the Christmas presents there are, and ever will be!”
    Simon and I gasped.

“All yours? What about the other Naughties?” asked Simon.

“Of course he doesn’t care about them, why are you asking him that?” I whispered to Simon.

“Those nitwits? Ha! I could care less how many presents they get. They’re just stepping stones for me,” said Amadeus.

I noticed that more Naughties began to come out of my house who were able to elude their noses from the gas.

“Why, all I had to do to convince to bring me here is give a couple good speeches to the ones who knew pilots, and then tell them I’d give them a share. I can’t believe they actually think I meant that!” said Amadeus.

“What?” said couple Naughties behind Amadeus.

Amadeus looked like a fish out of water when he heard their voices.

“How could you do this to us?”

“You promised us presents!”

“Liar!”

“Crook!”

The newly-reformed Naughties had all ganged up on Amadeus, and knocked him unconscious.

After apologies were made, and all the Naughties were sent home by the pilots who brought them there, all the elves and Santa Claus came out from hiding and congratulated Simon and I for saving the North Pole from Amadeus and the Naughties.

The Naughties were very embarrassed and felt terrible about the whole thing, but fortunately, Santa Claus is a forgiving man. He gave all the Naughties presents on Christmas Eve, except for Amadeus because they helped defeat him in the end.

On the day after Christmas, everyone started preparing for next year except for Simon and I. Santa Claus gave us a break for stopping Amadeus, so Simon and I spent the day with Mrs. Claus and helped her make cookies.

And that’s how Simon and I got our jobs as watch guards of the North Pole.

Yours Truly,

Lewis the Elf